Happiness is like a virus

By Gloria Chandy - editor of The Straits Times

Those feel-good vibes that flow from being happy can be good for your health. Moreover, your happiness will likely rub off on others, making them happy too. Happiness is like a virus - it can be passed on.

These are the findings of two studies done in the United States over the past 20 years.

In one of the studies, reported three years ago, researchers from Carnegie Mellon University said there is evidence that positive emotions like happiness are linked to good health and increased longevity.

While the scientists drew no definite conclusions after talking to hundreds of people over a 10-year period, they deduced that people with positive emotions experience lower rates of chronic illness, symptoms and pain.

They also found that "happy" test subjects were more resistant to cold and flu viruses than people with more negative feelings.

In the other study, a 20 year one by a team from the University of California at San Diego and Harvard University, 5000 participants were quizzed on their social networks. The researchers reported that, on average, every happy person in one's environment increases one's own chance of happiness by 9%.

We should welcome such "contagion". However, this isn't about the kind you feel after a pleasant evening with friends, or having snapped up a good bargain at a sales. It is about lasting happiness linked to positive thoughts.

A positive attitude, when in the most trying of circumstances, is admittedly hard to achieve, but it can help raise one's spirits and fight off those unhappy blues.

This week, we spoke to parents who have proved it. while their children's diagnoses of childhood cancer were surely the most depressing news for them, the parents of Aina and Naomi knew that they had to smile through their pain for their daughters' sake.

It must have been tough. Happiness is not just something we can switch on or off like an electric light. However, they achieved it. Their positive feelings have rubbed off on the children.

Both girls have bravely borne their illness and treatment, and little Aina has even taken on a counsellor's role - telling other little kids in the cancer ward to be brave and not cry.

She's helping to spread happiness in her way. I hope she will prove that the research findings are right.

Believe You Can Succeed And You Will

How To Develop The Power of Believe by David J. Schwartz.(author of The Magic of Thinking Big)

1. Think Success, don't think failure
At work, in your home, subsititute success thinking for failure thinking.
When you face a difficult situation, think, "I'll win," not "I'll probably lose."
When you compete with someone else, think, "I'm equal to the best," not "I'm out-classed."
When opportunity appears, think "Ican do it," never "I can't"
Let the master thought "I-will-succeed" dominate your thinking process. Thinking success conditions your mind to create plans that produces success. Thinking failure does the exact opposite. Failure thinking conditions the mind to think other thoughts that produce failure.

2. Remind yourself regularly that you are better than you think you are
Successful people are not supermen. Success does not require a super-intellect. Nor is there anything mystical above success. And success isn't based on luck. Successful people are just ordinary folks who have developed belief in themselves and what they do. Never-yes, never-sell yourself short.

3. Believe BIG
The size of your success is determined by the size of your belief. Think little goals and expect little achievement. Think big goals and win big success. Remeber this, too! Big ideas and big plans are often easier - certainly no more difficult - than small ideas and small plans.

THINK BIG!

Innerpositiveness Connect with People

Be genuine. Be yourself.

Be helpful. Help people whenever you think they need help and don’t expect a favor whenever you help someone.

Socialize. You cannot connect with people sitting in your room. Whether you connect through online social networking groups or some groups and gathering places in the physical world, you’ll need to reach those people and make them aware of your existence.

Converse. When you can hold conversation with people they remember you. Know about subjects enough to contradict or endorse and add more value to the ongoing discussion.

Be healthy. Managing an active social life along with managing work and family needs lots of energy. Keep a healthy lifestyle.

Innerpostiveness - Connect with Self

1. Self Awareness

“Knowing others is wisdom, knowing yourself is Enlightenment.” - Tao Tzu

• Understand self better
• Change those things you’d like to change
• Create the life you want
• Having clarity about:
  - who we are - what we want - why we want
  

2. Self Acceptance

• Change is possible when we fully know who we are & self acceptance
• Self acceptance is being loving & happy with who we are NOW.
• We'll know when we accepting yourself cause it feels great. Its an agreement with ourselves to appreciate, validate, accept and support who we are at this very moment.
  

3. Self Creation

• Self creation is about creating ourselves all over again.
• Starting fresh and rebuilding ourselves to become the very best, we've ever imagined.
• It's about becoming the person we want to be and creating a life that reflects that vision
  
  

4. Taking Self Ownership

• We can not create ourselves and our life anew without taking personal responsibility for we and where we are right now.
• We are responsible for our: Beliefs, Thoughts, Feelings and Actions
  
  
  
  

Innerpositiveness Reflection

1. Every day is a new page in my life. Every person I see and every phase I hear are the words & lines on the page.

2. I will not seek to have everything go as I want. I only wish for enough Courage to face reality.

3. I will not pray for health. I only hope to have a spirit filled with wisdom & a love that will never fade.

4. I will not look for fewer responsibilities. I only ask for even greater strength to do all the things that must be done to this world.

5. A sense of responsibility (R) is more important than a sense of justice (J).

6. Sense of responsibility is a demand on myself, while sense of justice is a demand on others. R is a rational self-reflection, an offering of my consciousness & talents. J is an emotional outpouring, an impusive response that may result in conflict with others.

7. Anger is a lack of responsibility towards myself, fruitlessly exhausting my body's physical & mental energy. It's an inner force of destruction that confuses the mind & destroys my problem-solving ability. Achieve a state of consciousness & face reality. Do not let reality disturb my mind's clarity & peace.

8. Obligation is 'ought to' & duty is 'must'. Obligations are restraints. Duties are natural, a fulfillment of my inner being.

9. Cultivate myself until my heart is tranquil & my mind is observant.

10. To practice meditation, first study meditation in daily life. When every action & thought in everyday life is done in meditation, only then is there, living meditation.

11. The goal of practicing meditation is to cultivate purity of heart, sincerity of mind & tranquility of temperament. Meditation, tranquility & sincerity cannot be separated.

12. When speech, action & behaviour are unified in the spirit & mind as one, this is true meditation.

13. When I use time well, every moment is a good opportunity for practicing meditation, whether dealing with people or situations.

14. Give & not ask for anything in return. Give my intelligence, labor, wealth, and material goods joyfully.

15. Speak softly & have a kind expression on my face.

16. Using my body, mouth and mind to do good deeds for the benefit of all.

16. Purify my body & mind as example for others to follow. Inspire all who work & live around me & encourage all.

17. Do my best & leave the rest to God. Do not keep difficulties inside my heart. Overcome difficulties & not be overcome by difficulties.

18. When there is no trouble, I treat others very nicely. This does not require any skill. When there is trouble & I am still good to others, then I have real skill.

19. Morality is a light for lifting myself, not a whip for chastising others.

20. Great joy means that at every moment I am happy. Joy has no jealousy, arrogance or anger.

21. Do not complain that people in this world are cold-blooded, utilitarian & unjust. These situations are perfect opportunities for me to do something great.

22. Rather than seek good fortune & longevity, look for peace. To have peace is to incur good fortune & longevity.

23. Pay attention to my tone of voice & my behaviour. Proper countenance, conduct, speech & deportment are achieved through moral cultivation & tolerance.

24. 'Good' is to be appropriate, just right, and not going off on deviating paths, or being extreme. When I love others, I won't spoil them, produce anger or hatred, or discriminate unjustly in my relationship with others. With wisdom, I eradicate the desire to possess the persons I love. With kindness, I do my utmost to understand those I do not love and those with whom I do not get along well.

25. Have great compassion for all.

Towering Lighthouse : Follow Your Purpose – Kindling Your Inner Fire

Wisdom from The Monk Who sold His Ferrari by Robin Sharma

Sharing by SSC

The purpose of life is a life of purpose.
Enlighten = know where we are going and what we want out of life – emotionally, physically, materially, spiritually.

Happiness = achievement

Goal setting is the starting point

1. Form a clear mental image of the outcome
2. Create positive pressure to keep us inspired
3. Set a deadline
4. Write down your goals = you cannot hit a target you cannot see.
5. Magic Rule of 21 – perform new habits 21 days in a row

Reflection by JY

Definition: tower or other building with a powerful light at top, erected at the entrance of a port, or at some important point on a coast, to serve as a guide to mariners at night; a pharos.

After reading, my mind saw an influx of thoughts and life principles flooding in; such as a man without a vision, would perish, a man without a vision would go back to his past; if you fail to plan, you plan to fail. A purposeful Life really begins with a life purpose. And this particular chapter clearly defines and expound on this fact.

Another deviation from my train of thoughts leads me to something bigger, beyond myself, beyond all the getting in the pursuit of happiness, hidden sometimes between the alleys of getting ahead in the “Rat Race” or to climb up the corporate ladder so that to be the “Top Dog”, after all, all the “sidetracking” would also transform to a mere beast of the land, a human without a conscious heart – that’s what I meant.

Thus, the purpose of a lighthouse illustration is more than just a “light emitter” but really, one that fits her purpose, to serve as a guide, a safe haven, a place of refuge and comfort to the ones out there, ravage by the storms of life.

Will you be the One, who bother and dares to Make a Difference, One life at a time. Let’s begin today!

Garden : Master Your Mind – Wisdom of Personal Change

Wisdom from The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari by Robin Sharma

Sharing by SSC

Our mind is like a garden. If you take good care of it, it will blossom beyond your expectation. But if you let the weeds to grow and take root, you will not have lasting peace and harmony.

A good gardener will not let toxic waste enter his/ her garden. (Toxic waste = worries, anxieties, living in the past or future, self created fear = drain the minds of its powers and injures the soul )

Mind Management = Life Management

To have fulfilling lives = no negative thoughts

60,000 thoughts per day – 95% are the same ones thought the day before
If majority of thoughts = negative thoughts = bad mental habits

Reflection by KS

The garden is the mind. To flourish, we have to put in fertilizer in different forms of positive thoughts if we want to reap the fruits or enjoy the beauty of the garden.

“I was looking forward to a sales appointment that I have set a couple of weeks ago. Wanting the sales so much that I begin to visualize closing the sales, immediately the day after the appointments was set.

Scenes of the contract being signed and me smiling and shaking hands with the clients. I have this image in my mind every day and enjoy the happiness of the success of the sales.

A day before the actual date of the appointment, my client’s email me to inform me of the success of the sales! When I meet the client to discuss the contract, the scene was the same as I have visualized!”

We need to be sensitive to the external negative situation & thoughts. We just have to switch to see the opposite of the non favorable situations.

Instead of lost in a new place, it could have been the discovery of a new area or opportunity. Through such constant reflections, we shall achieve mental toughness and create opportunities for personal growth & success.