Thanking Your Way to Health and Happiness

Published by Associated Press
St Petersburg (Florida)

Say thanks, it might make you feel better.

Academics have long theorised that expressions of thank promote health and happiness and give optimism and energy to the downtrodden.

In recent years, researchers have tried to measure the benefits of gratitude. In a National Science Foundation funded study, Northeastern University psychologist David DeSteno has participants complete an arduous data entry task only to have it lost by a computer malfunction.
Then, a lab assistant, seemingly unconnected to the study and claiming to be in a hurry with his own experiment, restores the lost work.

The participants are dismissed. They bump into the lab assistant, who asks for help.; Dr DeSteno found those who had been helped by the assistant, and were grateful for it, were more likely to return the favour, and did so for longer than those in a group not helped.

"Gratitude leads people to act in virtues or more selfless ways," said Dr DeSteno, whose research was published earlier this year in the journal Current Directions In Psychological Science. "And it builds social support, which we know is tied to both physical and psychological well being."

Dr Robert Emmons, a psychology professor at the University of California, Davis, said those who offer gratitude are less envious and resentful. They sleep longer, exercise more and report a drop in blood pressure, said Dr Emmons, who wrote Thanks! How Practising Gratitude Can Make You Happier.

Dr Brenda Shoshanna, a New York psychologist, agreed. "You can't be depressed and grateful at the same time," said Dr Shoshanna, the author of 365 Ways To Give Thanks: One For Every Day Of The Year. "It makes a person physically, mentally, in every way healthier."

Positive Psychology in the Workplace

The Positivity Ratio
By Lisa Sansom

You may have heard of a "magic" 3 to 1 positivity ratio - or this may be the first time you are hearing about it. However, this positivity ratio can be very important for you personally and professionally, so let me talk a bit about what it is and how you can implement it.

The 3:1 positivity ratio is based on research by Barbara Fredrickson and she writes about it in her book Positivity. The essence is that for every one negative emotion, we should experience and cultivate three positive emotions in order to flourish. People who are depressed tend to have ratios that are closer to 1:1 - not even more negatives than positives, but they experience about the same number of each. People who are flourishing, in their lives overall, tend to experience 3:1 at a minimum, and possibly more.

Why is this?

First of all, negative emotions tend to be more weighty. When you look back on your life, it is likely easier to remember the down times, and those memories can bring you down again. It is less easy to remember the joyful and exuberant times, and when you do remember those high points, the current emotion you experience may be more akin to satisfaction or contentment - not the highs that you lived before.

Also, negative emotions tend to last longer than positive emotions. This is a result of the way our brains are wired - it's not right or wrong, it just is. Negative emotions stay with us longer, and so have a greater impact on us.

Positive emotions tend to be more fleeting, especially in their highest, most energetic states. People can stay in a state of contentment for a while, but probably not in a state of ecstatic joy.

All of this means that for every one negative emotion, you should actively try to experience or cultivate three positive emotions to counteract the downward spiral that could result otherwise.

This 3:1 ratio is a mathematical average - you should also be aware that in marriages, for example, research is showing that a 5:1 ratio is a better predictor of health and longevity. In the workplace, high-performance teams track at 6:1.

So what does this mean for you? Two things:

1. Actively cultivate more positive emotion. Barbara Fredrickson's website has some links and tools for you to assess your current ratio. See http://www.positivityratio.com/

2. Refocus your attention on the good events that do happen. You may not need to actively create new positive experiences, but give your attention to the positive events that are naturally occurring around you. This will also boost your positivity ratio.

Innerpositiveness Switch from X to Y (contribution by Madeline Wan)

Innerpositiveness Leader

By Madeline Wan

We are here for a purpose..

Live a great meaningful and purposeful life!
Would our life be defined by how much material possessions we acquired or perhaps a heart, a life we have touched?
Go MAD!
Cultivate our spirit, character and body and that of those under our charge!

We have the capacity..

Greatness is in ALL of Us. Believe it.
We have the capacity to give and to bless.

Our Purpose

Transforming our organization..
a Vision is but a thousand steps of doing..
have a disciplined mind to execute..

How big do you want your biz to be?

The size of heart determines the size of our business…
Have space in your heart for people..

Our State of Mind (SOM) is key..

Mental Stillness or Mental Tension?
Our well being determines that of those below us..

Feel good! Look better!

Don’t beat yourself!
Certainty and Confidence comes from not knowing everything but believing you can learn and do everything…

May peace be with you..

God, grant me,
Serenity to accept things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can, and
Wisdom to know the difference.

Our appreciation

Let’s just do your best, and God will do the rest.
Thank you leaders.

The Art of Happiness

By Dalai Lama

The purpose of life is to seek happiness that last. Genuine Happiness is a feeling of joy and a sense of inner contentment that results from developing inner discipline which is calm, peace state of mind, rooted in affection and compassion.

Pleasure can also result in a feeling of joy, but based mainly on physical sensory experiences and subject to change at any time, and will not last, that feeling is only temporary.

Genuine Happiness relates more to the state of one's mind and heart, and it is much more stable, reliable, and long lasting than pleasure. Tibetan concept of mind “Sem” has a much broader meaning, closer to `psyche' or `spirit'; it includes intellect and feeling, heart and mind."

So it's not just "positive thinking" that's the key, it's positive being. By bringing about a certain inner discipline, we can undergo a transformation of our attitude, our entire outlook and approach to living.

There are many components to a happy life - having enough money to have one's basic needs met, other people with whom one can share things, love, and so on. It is still possible to be happy even if one has very little money, is in poor health, or even if one is not fortunate enough to have a special relationship with a spouse or lover.

On the other hand, no matter how wealthy a person is, no matter how wonderful their spouse is, or no matter how much "external" success one enjoys or praise one receives, if a person's mind is in turmoil, if it is troubled by anger, hatred, fear, anxiety, or jealousy, then it is impossible to really be happy.

Even though certain having a certain amount of money and so on are factors for enjoying a happy life, one's mental state, the "mind factor" is the predominant or key component.

Happiness can be achieved through training the mind. By getting into the habit of spending a few minutes each day engaged in any practice that helps quiet and focuses the mind--practices such as meditation or prayer. This can help one develop a calm, peace state of mind – inner discipline.

Happiness is like a virus

By Gloria Chandy - editor of The Straits Times

Those feel-good vibes that flow from being happy can be good for your health. Moreover, your happiness will likely rub off on others, making them happy too. Happiness is like a virus - it can be passed on.

These are the findings of two studies done in the United States over the past 20 years.

In one of the studies, reported three years ago, researchers from Carnegie Mellon University said there is evidence that positive emotions like happiness are linked to good health and increased longevity.

While the scientists drew no definite conclusions after talking to hundreds of people over a 10-year period, they deduced that people with positive emotions experience lower rates of chronic illness, symptoms and pain.

They also found that "happy" test subjects were more resistant to cold and flu viruses than people with more negative feelings.

In the other study, a 20 year one by a team from the University of California at San Diego and Harvard University, 5000 participants were quizzed on their social networks. The researchers reported that, on average, every happy person in one's environment increases one's own chance of happiness by 9%.

We should welcome such "contagion". However, this isn't about the kind you feel after a pleasant evening with friends, or having snapped up a good bargain at a sales. It is about lasting happiness linked to positive thoughts.

A positive attitude, when in the most trying of circumstances, is admittedly hard to achieve, but it can help raise one's spirits and fight off those unhappy blues.

This week, we spoke to parents who have proved it. while their children's diagnoses of childhood cancer were surely the most depressing news for them, the parents of Aina and Naomi knew that they had to smile through their pain for their daughters' sake.

It must have been tough. Happiness is not just something we can switch on or off like an electric light. However, they achieved it. Their positive feelings have rubbed off on the children.

Both girls have bravely borne their illness and treatment, and little Aina has even taken on a counsellor's role - telling other little kids in the cancer ward to be brave and not cry.

She's helping to spread happiness in her way. I hope she will prove that the research findings are right.

Believe You Can Succeed And You Will

How To Develop The Power of Believe by David J. Schwartz.(author of The Magic of Thinking Big)

1. Think Success, don't think failure
At work, in your home, subsititute success thinking for failure thinking.
When you face a difficult situation, think, "I'll win," not "I'll probably lose."
When you compete with someone else, think, "I'm equal to the best," not "I'm out-classed."
When opportunity appears, think "Ican do it," never "I can't"
Let the master thought "I-will-succeed" dominate your thinking process. Thinking success conditions your mind to create plans that produces success. Thinking failure does the exact opposite. Failure thinking conditions the mind to think other thoughts that produce failure.

2. Remind yourself regularly that you are better than you think you are
Successful people are not supermen. Success does not require a super-intellect. Nor is there anything mystical above success. And success isn't based on luck. Successful people are just ordinary folks who have developed belief in themselves and what they do. Never-yes, never-sell yourself short.

3. Believe BIG
The size of your success is determined by the size of your belief. Think little goals and expect little achievement. Think big goals and win big success. Remeber this, too! Big ideas and big plans are often easier - certainly no more difficult - than small ideas and small plans.

THINK BIG!

Innerpositiveness Connect with People

Be genuine. Be yourself.

Be helpful. Help people whenever you think they need help and don’t expect a favor whenever you help someone.

Socialize. You cannot connect with people sitting in your room. Whether you connect through online social networking groups or some groups and gathering places in the physical world, you’ll need to reach those people and make them aware of your existence.

Converse. When you can hold conversation with people they remember you. Know about subjects enough to contradict or endorse and add more value to the ongoing discussion.

Be healthy. Managing an active social life along with managing work and family needs lots of energy. Keep a healthy lifestyle.

Innerpostiveness - Connect with Self

1. Self Awareness

“Knowing others is wisdom, knowing yourself is Enlightenment.” - Tao Tzu

• Understand self better
• Change those things you’d like to change
• Create the life you want
• Having clarity about:
  - who we are - what we want - why we want
  

2. Self Acceptance

• Change is possible when we fully know who we are & self acceptance
• Self acceptance is being loving & happy with who we are NOW.
• We'll know when we accepting yourself cause it feels great. Its an agreement with ourselves to appreciate, validate, accept and support who we are at this very moment.
  

3. Self Creation

• Self creation is about creating ourselves all over again.
• Starting fresh and rebuilding ourselves to become the very best, we've ever imagined.
• It's about becoming the person we want to be and creating a life that reflects that vision
  
  

4. Taking Self Ownership

• We can not create ourselves and our life anew without taking personal responsibility for we and where we are right now.
• We are responsible for our: Beliefs, Thoughts, Feelings and Actions
  
  
  
  

Innerpositiveness Reflection

1. Every day is a new page in my life. Every person I see and every phase I hear are the words & lines on the page.

2. I will not seek to have everything go as I want. I only wish for enough Courage to face reality.

3. I will not pray for health. I only hope to have a spirit filled with wisdom & a love that will never fade.

4. I will not look for fewer responsibilities. I only ask for even greater strength to do all the things that must be done to this world.

5. A sense of responsibility (R) is more important than a sense of justice (J).

6. Sense of responsibility is a demand on myself, while sense of justice is a demand on others. R is a rational self-reflection, an offering of my consciousness & talents. J is an emotional outpouring, an impusive response that may result in conflict with others.

7. Anger is a lack of responsibility towards myself, fruitlessly exhausting my body's physical & mental energy. It's an inner force of destruction that confuses the mind & destroys my problem-solving ability. Achieve a state of consciousness & face reality. Do not let reality disturb my mind's clarity & peace.

8. Obligation is 'ought to' & duty is 'must'. Obligations are restraints. Duties are natural, a fulfillment of my inner being.

9. Cultivate myself until my heart is tranquil & my mind is observant.

10. To practice meditation, first study meditation in daily life. When every action & thought in everyday life is done in meditation, only then is there, living meditation.

11. The goal of practicing meditation is to cultivate purity of heart, sincerity of mind & tranquility of temperament. Meditation, tranquility & sincerity cannot be separated.

12. When speech, action & behaviour are unified in the spirit & mind as one, this is true meditation.

13. When I use time well, every moment is a good opportunity for practicing meditation, whether dealing with people or situations.

14. Give & not ask for anything in return. Give my intelligence, labor, wealth, and material goods joyfully.

15. Speak softly & have a kind expression on my face.

16. Using my body, mouth and mind to do good deeds for the benefit of all.

16. Purify my body & mind as example for others to follow. Inspire all who work & live around me & encourage all.

17. Do my best & leave the rest to God. Do not keep difficulties inside my heart. Overcome difficulties & not be overcome by difficulties.

18. When there is no trouble, I treat others very nicely. This does not require any skill. When there is trouble & I am still good to others, then I have real skill.

19. Morality is a light for lifting myself, not a whip for chastising others.

20. Great joy means that at every moment I am happy. Joy has no jealousy, arrogance or anger.

21. Do not complain that people in this world are cold-blooded, utilitarian & unjust. These situations are perfect opportunities for me to do something great.

22. Rather than seek good fortune & longevity, look for peace. To have peace is to incur good fortune & longevity.

23. Pay attention to my tone of voice & my behaviour. Proper countenance, conduct, speech & deportment are achieved through moral cultivation & tolerance.

24. 'Good' is to be appropriate, just right, and not going off on deviating paths, or being extreme. When I love others, I won't spoil them, produce anger or hatred, or discriminate unjustly in my relationship with others. With wisdom, I eradicate the desire to possess the persons I love. With kindness, I do my utmost to understand those I do not love and those with whom I do not get along well.

25. Have great compassion for all.

Towering Lighthouse : Follow Your Purpose – Kindling Your Inner Fire

Wisdom from The Monk Who sold His Ferrari by Robin Sharma

Sharing by SSC

The purpose of life is a life of purpose.
Enlighten = know where we are going and what we want out of life – emotionally, physically, materially, spiritually.

Happiness = achievement

Goal setting is the starting point

1. Form a clear mental image of the outcome
2. Create positive pressure to keep us inspired
3. Set a deadline
4. Write down your goals = you cannot hit a target you cannot see.
5. Magic Rule of 21 – perform new habits 21 days in a row

Reflection by JY

Definition: tower or other building with a powerful light at top, erected at the entrance of a port, or at some important point on a coast, to serve as a guide to mariners at night; a pharos.

After reading, my mind saw an influx of thoughts and life principles flooding in; such as a man without a vision, would perish, a man without a vision would go back to his past; if you fail to plan, you plan to fail. A purposeful Life really begins with a life purpose. And this particular chapter clearly defines and expound on this fact.

Another deviation from my train of thoughts leads me to something bigger, beyond myself, beyond all the getting in the pursuit of happiness, hidden sometimes between the alleys of getting ahead in the “Rat Race” or to climb up the corporate ladder so that to be the “Top Dog”, after all, all the “sidetracking” would also transform to a mere beast of the land, a human without a conscious heart – that’s what I meant.

Thus, the purpose of a lighthouse illustration is more than just a “light emitter” but really, one that fits her purpose, to serve as a guide, a safe haven, a place of refuge and comfort to the ones out there, ravage by the storms of life.

Will you be the One, who bother and dares to Make a Difference, One life at a time. Let’s begin today!

Garden : Master Your Mind – Wisdom of Personal Change

Wisdom from The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari by Robin Sharma

Sharing by SSC

Our mind is like a garden. If you take good care of it, it will blossom beyond your expectation. But if you let the weeds to grow and take root, you will not have lasting peace and harmony.

A good gardener will not let toxic waste enter his/ her garden. (Toxic waste = worries, anxieties, living in the past or future, self created fear = drain the minds of its powers and injures the soul )

Mind Management = Life Management

To have fulfilling lives = no negative thoughts

60,000 thoughts per day – 95% are the same ones thought the day before
If majority of thoughts = negative thoughts = bad mental habits

Reflection by KS

The garden is the mind. To flourish, we have to put in fertilizer in different forms of positive thoughts if we want to reap the fruits or enjoy the beauty of the garden.

“I was looking forward to a sales appointment that I have set a couple of weeks ago. Wanting the sales so much that I begin to visualize closing the sales, immediately the day after the appointments was set.

Scenes of the contract being signed and me smiling and shaking hands with the clients. I have this image in my mind every day and enjoy the happiness of the success of the sales.

A day before the actual date of the appointment, my client’s email me to inform me of the success of the sales! When I meet the client to discuss the contract, the scene was the same as I have visualized!”

We need to be sensitive to the external negative situation & thoughts. We just have to switch to see the opposite of the non favorable situations.

Instead of lost in a new place, it could have been the discovery of a new area or opportunity. Through such constant reflections, we shall achieve mental toughness and create opportunities for personal growth & success.

The Path of Diamonds : Embrace the Present – Secret of Lifelong Happiness

Leadership Wisdom from The Monk Who sold His Ferrari by Robin Sharma

Sharing by SSC

In order to live an enlightened, joyous and rewarding life - Live in the NOW and live fully. Happiness is a journey not a destination.

Always remember that the path you are walking on right now is beautiful and studded with diamonds. Always live in the appreciation of the NOW.

Savor the NOW with family and friends. Enjoy every moment of the NOW.

Practice the act of GRATITUDE everyday

Follow the path of your dream and celebrate everyday as your dreams come true.

Be content in the NOW and do not hurry through life.

Everyone is unique and a wonder. A gift to the world. Build yourself little by little everyday.

Reflection by JO

Many of us out there suffers cause of the downturn, we can either be “Up” or “Down” everyday. These days, we can choose to be losers or winners. If I look round, surround me are true colleagues who encourage me when I am down, extend their assistance when I need help, confide in me when they need someone to talk to.

Clients that are nice to me but not nasty. A best friend in my life who doesn’t judge me for who I am and always been there when I need support. My family are all in good health and living in harmony. Not to mention my two lovely pet dogs that keeps me company, many only have one.

I am so much more fortunate than the rest.

Some have less than one meal or nothing to eat. I have 4 – 5 meals a day. Am greateful for what I have to day.

I like to take this opportunity to say thank you for those who have crossed my path, without you all, I won’t be enjoying what I am doing today. Gong Xi Fa Cai.

Gold Stopwatch : Respect Your Time – Most Precious Commodity

Leadership Wisdom from The Monk Who sold His Ferrari by Robin Sharma

Summarized by SSC

Time is finite and live must be lived to its fullest potential.
Time mastery = life mastery.


Plan daily/weekly to manage time creatively and focus on the most important aspects. Remember the 80/20 Principle - 80% of the results are generated by 20% of effort

Do not let others steal time. Develop the ability to say NO to little things so that you get the power to say YES to important things. Simplify life to be able to focus on the important things of life.

Develop a death-bed mentality. What would you do today if it was the last day of your life?

Always do things as if failure is not an option and success will be assured

Never be a prisoner of the past but be the architect of the future




Sharing by JY

Definition: A stopwatch is a handheld timepiece designed to measure the amount of time elapsed from a particular time when activated to when the piece is deactivated.

I love the illustration here – Stopwatch. Look here, firstly; it is “handheld” – which means it’s always within your control. No one else should own your time, beside Yourself.

Secondly, it’s measurable, specific, not vague or perplexed at all. Our dreams in life have to be measure constantly so that improvement can be made. That’s what separates Excellent from Average, Best and Good, Good and Better.

Thirdly, it has the capacity of being “elapsed” which means to say; once time lost, it will never comes back.

Lastly, it has the capacity of being “activated” and “deactivated”, which to me means, you have the CHOICE to let go all the bad memories / negativity (X) and/or to capture all the beautiful memories / positive ness or (Y), thus there’s no compromise or reasons to why, you can’t pick yourself up and run again, fight again!

So, what are you doing with your time today?


Sharing by YLH

Deathbed Mentality

"Stop acting like you have 500 years to live ... the best time to plant a tree was 40 years ago. The second best time is today. Don't even waste one minute of your day. Develop a deathbed mentality." – Robin Sharma

We are all constantly struggling with “the best time to …” & “perfect” scenarios, and worrying about what the future lies ahead of us. In reality, there will never be a “perfect scenario” to initiate the things that we’ve always wanted to achieve or get done, nor should we worry about what the future will be, as the best time to put things into action and cultivate the future is NOW.

I am a practitioner of the “deathbed mentality”, which has driven me to always “live each day as if it’s your last”. Life is uncertain but death is for certain. I take cognizance of the fact that I could be dead tomorrow and do not wish to a leave this life with regrets. As such, lead the life that you’ve wanted, put your dreams into action and spend time with your loved ones … “Don’t waste one minute of your day!”. Carpe Diem – Sieze the Day!

The Pink Wire Cable :Live with Discipline

Wisdom from the book The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari by Robin Sharma



Summarized BY SSC

A wire cable consists of many tiny strings woven together. The strings by itself is weak but together when they form the cable it is strong.


Will-power and discipline are like the strings that need to be woven together to make it strong.

Discipline and self-control is the act of controlling the mind and this can be done by replacing weak and negative thoughts with strong and positive ones.

Control your thoughts, control your mind, control your life = master of your destiny.



Reflection by AT

Have you ever experienced wanting to quit smoking, drinking coffee for the sake of health but never really have the WILL POWER and self-discipline to do so?

I am sure everyone will have habits to overcome but haven’t really decided firmly on quitting any of these habits or addictions. Therefore it is crucial to recognize the will power and self-discipline.

These two are inseparable companion that will make a difference in everyone’s life. Infact, little we did realize that the success we have achieved in life are well connected with these two elements.

Discipline is about focus and is about having the ability to be aware of personal goal and realizing the steps to reach your destination plus executing each step taken in perfection. And will power is about self-control, inner strength and self-awareness that guide us to pick the right or appropriate behavior or reactions.

Remember the childhood rhyme….


Little drops of water,
little grains of sand,
make the mighty ocean
and the beauteous land….

~by Julia Carney, 1845~


Sharing by KS

The wire is a symbol of discipline. We can built up our discipline with small steps through the persistency of will power. Taking a step at a time will help overcome the will weakness of resistance.

“ I’ve always have a weak body system till I adopt the Pink Wire Cable concept to change my unhealthy habit of drinking flavor water to just clear water.

Through my 30 years of adult life I have rely on alternative medicine to improve my health instead of the western medicine. It is with this discipline that I have discovered a newer healthier self and a pleasant awareness of my taste buds to tastier morsels around me. “

Building the discipline step by step makes you stronger to fight against the challenges that surfaces. Small steps allow you to see the future path and success much clearer upon the achievement you made in each and every step.

The Fragrant Rose : Selflessly Serve Others – Ultimate Purpose of Life

Wisdom from the book The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari by Robin Sharma

Summarized by: SSC

The quality of life comes down to the quality of your contributions

Serve people daily and show random acts of kindness because the hand that serves roses to others retains some of the fragrance

Abundance of mental ability, boundless energy, unlimited creativity, a storehouse of discipline and a well-spring of peacefulness are gifts that you need to develop in yourself in order to share it with others

Compassion and daily acts of kindness makes life far richer.

Cultivate friends and nurture family. A person with 3 solid friends are very wealthy indeed.

Sharing By: OPY

Reading about how helping others makes one's quality of life richer adds as an reinforcement to myself in being diligent in doing daily acts of kindness. I have no qualms in dropping some loose change into the donation tins whenever I see students doing their part for flag day.

Taking it as my tiny bit of contribution back to society and the less priviledged; rewarding the students for their time and effort and also being grateful for the opportunity to be of help to others.

About a year ago, I chanced upon a book by Master Cheng Yen where she advocates daily acts of kindness, rather than one big contribution to cultivate the spirit of giving and caring on a daily basis. That got me started to put aside a small token of money daily and giving dana when the monies accumulate. It's heartening to know that the acts of selflessness is universal and serves to better not just the recepient but also the giver.